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Saturday April 29th 2017

Getting Your Ex Back

Getting Your Ex Back

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Issue 1: Fighting

A predominant reason for breakups is fighting. For some couples, a breakup results from an accumulation of small fights. For other couples, a huge blowout triggers the separation. A reason partners in this category cite for getting back together is the ability to resolve the underlying issues that fuel the fighting (e.g., infidelity, trust, money). Other partners simply start to get along better resulting in an organic road to renewal, requiring little work.

Issue 2: Communication

Some breakups occur because of poor communication. We've all had to deal with someone who talked too much, too little, or too superficially. You may even be one of these talk-deficient people in need of Communication 101. When communication problems lead to a breakup, renewals occur with a change in the communication pattern. For some couples, the communication change comes in the form of one partner or both partners opening up about relationship issues, day-to-day life, fears, desires, or the past.

Issue 3: Time Spent Together

The reason some couples combust is because of unequal expectations in how much time needs to be spent together. Now pay attention. For couples in this category, the typical reason for renewing a relationship is not because the time-together expectations decrease. Rather, renewal occurs if partners spend more time together.

Issue 4: Insecurity

Another major reason couples split is due to relationship insecurity. Insecurity can stem from diverging views on the direction of the relationship. For example, if you're looking to get married and she wants to date multiple people, then you might find yourself a wee bit insecure. Alternatively, insecurity may arise from ambivalence towards the relationship. A take-it-or-leave-it attitude regarding the relationship can play havoc with one's sense of well-being. Almost needless to say, expressing commitment to each other often leads to renewals when security is at issue. Even the act of fighting to stay together shows commitment and increases security.

Issue 5: Rut

Breakups can also occur because a relationship becomes boring. If this point resonates, ensure you and your partner don't reunite just because making up constitutes something exciting. Go back because you find ways to increase excitement through new activities, better communication or sex. If someone's attractiveness plummets because of the rut, have no fear. Attractiveness can be reclaimed (and not through plastic surgery). Apologizing, better perspective taking, and plain effort to become a better person can increase one's attractiveness and invigorate the flatlining relationship.




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If you are going to lie, tell believable lies and keep track of the lies you tell; this will prevent you from being caught in your lie.

Would you betray your own morals and/or business ethics if you could get ahead?

Yes, because I have no morals
Yes, but only if I really needed the money
No, I am perfectly successful already
No, I have strong/rigid morals

You got questions, we got answers